- I don't like sports and don't follow them, at all.
- I don't watch TV.
- I don't watch most movies and certainly not current movies (the last two "new" movies I watched on DVD were Capote and Prairie Home Companion - both good but not quite "guy talk" candidates).
- I don't hunt or fish. There's nothing wrong with either - I'm a carnivore, I know where meat comes from. I'll eat game meat with gusto if offered it. I am just not into killing the animal myself to get it. I am not into growing my own wheat for my bread, either.
- Did I mention I don't like sports and don't watch TV?
- I don't hold mainstream political or religious thoughts (and it's not polite nor safe to talk about religion or politics anyway).
- I am not handy and rarely make things with tools (I wish I did more, though - add woodworking to my list of things I'd like to learn before I die (but probably won't)).
- I like to cook and am the main cook for the household.
- I don't read (most) fiction.
- I don't like nor play golf. In fact, I don't play any sport, so there goes bonding in a softball team. The outcome of being bad at athletics and taunted about it growing up, I'm sure.
- I don't like poker (or gambling in general) and detest hearing about it ("Last night I had this hand with two kings and then the other guy had...")
- I no longer enjoy books or movies about war (except Catch-22, of course).
- I don't like beer - I prefer to ingest other forms of yeast excrement instead.
- I am not into cars (or boats, jet skis, planes, snowmobiles or even riding lawnmowers). My dad was a mechanic while I was growing up and he didn't want me to follow in his footsteps so he successfully kept me from learning much about engines.
- That non-sports thing.
Lots of "I don'ts" in that list, which is really egotistical and negative, I know. Sorry about that. But if I am going to figure out what is hanging me up around fellowship, then I have to look at myself honestly.
So...once all of the above is ruled out, in most groupings of men I find myself among I end up having absolutely nothing to contribute to the conversation. So I just stay quiet. It's mostly OK - I've been an "outsider" all my life. But it does put a crimp on that fellowship thing.